Sims 3: Athena Sparks 3

I decided to take a walk. For the first time in a long time, a book is not enough to satisfy me.  I believe that I am at a point in my life where I need something more than the imaginary world of books. 

Just once, I’d like to experience a real kiss or hug from a man, rather than just read about it.

I’m almost embarrassed to admit it, but I am a woman in my thirties that has never been truly kissed.  Now before you start hearing melodramatic music in your head, I’ve been on dates and I’ve enjoyed the company of men, albeit a very few, but I have never felt the passion that I’ve read about in books and I’ve certainly never felt that I was in love…

…until now.  This is Desmond’s house and no I’m not stalking him.  He just happens to live down the road from me and I just happen to have found that out after taking a walk one evening.  So, I now just so happen to enjoy taking walks around that same time every day since then with the tiny thought in my mind that maybe I’ll catch a glimpse of him.

I’m disappointed that he’s not outside.  I wonder if he’s home and what he’s doing.  I keep walking.

Again, I feel ashamed.  I am way too old to walk around hoping to catch a glimpse of a man that I find attractive.  Most people outgrow this type of behavior during high school, or college at the latest.  Me…I guess I’m a late bloomer.

Desmond is not the only reason that I enjoy my evening walks, although it may sound like it. 

I don’t know how many ways I can say this, but this town is absolutely beautiful. 

If there was any place for a woman like me to come out of her shell and pursue love for the first time…Hidden Springs is it.

This place is pure magic and I can imagine myself standing here with Desmond as the moon trades places with the sun.

I can imagine him whispering in my ear as we stare at the mountains and the cool breeze off the lake caresses our skin, just before he pulls me close and kisses me.

I stand and imagine.  I imagine and hope, but the truth is…

The only way any of it will ever happen is if I take that first step.  I’m going to have to speak to him.

The thought scares me, but I didn’t move here to allow fear to paralyze me.  I moved here for a new start.

But how do I take the first step?

I’ll go and knock on his door and introduce myself.  What’s the worst that could happen?

I walk toward his house with the intention of marching up to his doorstep and knocking, but the closer I get, the more my heart pounds.  I can’t even walk on the same side of the street without feeling like I’m going to pass out. 

I’m determined to go and knock on his door…

…eventually.

But now is not the time.  I know that I’m not ready.

Instead I find myself back at home preparing a salad for dinner.

The nights are the worst.  Being lonely during the night is a totally different animal.

Here I am, eating dinner alone.

Blessed with a great imagination, I stare at the empty chair across from me, imagining Desmond’s smiling face; praising me for a great home cooked meal.

But all the imagining in the world doesn’t cover up the fact that the chair is empty and will remain so unless I take the first step.

I crawl into bed, knowing full well what I’m going to have to do.

Tomorrow, I will introduce myself to Desmond.

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